Category: Law

Here are some of the highlights of today’s interrogation of Judge Roberts.

First, we have questions from the illustrious Senator Kennedy:

KENNEDY: The stark and tragic images of human suffering in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina have reminded us yet again that civil rights and equal rights are still the great unfinished business of America.

The suffering has been disproportionately borne by the weak, the poor, the elderly and infirm, and largely African-Americans, who were forced by poverty, illness, unequal opportunity to stay behind and bear the brunt of the storm’s winds and floods.

ROBERTS: If I may interrupt, your eminence, I’d like the record to reflect my opposition to floods. Floods involve large quantities of water, which can make people drown. I hate it when people drown. In fact, drowning seriously pisses me off. When I hear about somebody drowning, I want to kick some ass, some big, fat, arrogant, shameless ass. Like yours, Senator Fat Ass Drowning Kennedy. Please continue, you disgusting son of a mobster’s bitch.

KENNEDY: If we could move on. Now, the Brown decision was just the beginning of the historic march for progress toward equal rights for all of our citizens.

In the ’60s and ’70s, we came together as a Congress, Republicans and Democrats alike, and passed the historic civil rights legislation that signed by the president to guarantee equality for all citizens on the basis of race, then on gender, then on disability.

ROBERTS: Right on, your honor, I’m all for the march of progress. It seriously chaps my ass when some people are left behind as others march, or swim if you prefer, to a better, happier, and longer life. Just because a woman can’t swim as well as her drunken sot of a big fat disgusting big-headed boss I don’t think she should be left behind to drown and die. That’s wrong and it’s not what our Constitution stands for, you horny twit. What else you got?

KENNEDY: Let me, if I could, go to the Civil Rights Restoration Act. In 1981, you support an effort by the Department of Education to reverse 17 years of civil right protections at colleges and universities that receive federal funds. [blah blah blah…you hate Negroes don’t you?… blah blah blah.]

ROBERTS: Wrong again, space turkey, I was just watching some porn with Clarence the other night. It was the sequel to Long Dong Silver called Big Head Kennedy about a guy who goes around raping women and getting away with it because of his mafia connnections; his uncle is a senator. I recommend it to your worthless criminal ass.

Civil rights law is complicated business, and you aren’t going to understand my answer without some serious help from the tutor who took all your tests for you at Harvard. But let’s play the game, here’s my answer [8 minute tutorial on civil rights law.]

I was right, wasn’t I? Now go have a drink before you embarrass your children any more.

KENNEDY: My time is up, Mr. Chairman.

SPECTER: Thank you very much, Senator Kennedy, now go fuck yourself.

Next up: Senator Feinstein asks about abortions, comparable worth, and Mrs. Roberts’ cookie recipe.

California’s Supreme Court has ruled that lesbian partners who cooperate to bear children are obligated to pay child support and share custody when they break up just like regular parents:

SAN FRANCISCO (AP) – Same-sex couples who raise children are lawful parents, and just like heterosexual couples, they must provide for their children if they break up, the California Supreme Court ruled Monday.

The justices ruled for the first time that custody and child support laws that hold absent fathers accountable also apply to estranged gay and lesbian couples who used reproductive science to conceive.

Ruling in three different lesbian parenting cases, the court continued to recognize the rights of same-sex couples.

Gay rights advocates see this as a major victory for the recognition of same-sex partnerships, but it’s not going to met with widespread joy and happiness by actual lesbians. Each of the tree cases the justices took on featured two contending (lesbian) parties, in both combinations. One case featured a bio-mom who wanted child support from the non-bio-mom, and another case featured a non-bio-mom who wanted custody rights, which means she’s on the hook for child support.

Conservative groups are upset, but their anger is probably misguided:

“You’ve essentially begun to undermine and unravel the family,” said Mathew D. Staver of Liberty Counsel, which submitted supporting briefs arguing against recognition of two same-sex parents.

This is misguided because the courts are simply dealing with situations that happen in the real world, and they’re not in a position to force lesbians to go straight or to turn back the clock on reproductive technologies.

These cases establish a parental right that the legislature has been unable to establish in statute, despite many attempts at passing a “de-facto parent” law that would have assigned parental rights on a behavioral basis. The “de-facto parent” bill carried by John Vasconcellos several times in the past had problems with the rights of a biological father who may or may not have been in the picture, but this ruling appears to be much more narrow, focused on sperm donation cases where the biological father is without parental rights as a matter of law.

The effect of the these rulings is simply to invite more people in the world of child support and custody disputes, a wonderful place for Californians.

As a veteran of that world, let me be among the first to welcome these lesbian moms to the fold and to encourage them to lobby for a bit of justice. Bio-moms are still going to be considered more equal than others, but it’s up to you to change that and see to it that the law provides for full equality, not just standing to support your ex-partner’s preferred lifestyle while you struggle with token bits of visitation. I hope the fathers’ rights people welcome you, because if I were still active in that struggle I certainly would.

UPDATE: Rough and Tumble has a google of links on this subject, just scroll down.

Because you can’t get Sudafed without a scrip:

PORTLAND, Ore. (AP) — Gov. Ted Kulongoski on Tuesday signed legislation that will make Oregon the first state to require prescriptions for cold and allergy medications that can be converted into methamphetamine.

The requirement applies to any medication containing pseudoephedrine, the key ingredient in the highly addictive street drug.

“This is a tremendous start but we must recognize that it is just that, a start,” the governor said. “We have a long way to go.”

I’m going to start smuggling it in from Washington and selling it on streetcorners for five bucks a hit.

My cat Fluffy likes Ann Coulter. He’s a big bird-eater, and she looks like a sparrow to him, so whenever she comes on the TV he gets real hungry, chows down, and goes to sleep. Fluffy’s very pleased with Ann’s attack on this Judge Roberts dude, who apparently doesn’t collect Hitler memorabilia or make his kids address him as Mein Fuehrer:

Apparently, Roberts decided early on that he wanted to be on the Supreme Court and that the way to do that was not to express a personal opinion on anything to anybody ever. It’s as if he is from some space alien sleeper cell. Maybe the space aliens are trying to help us, but I wish we knew that.

If the Senate were in Democrat hands, Roberts would be perfect. But why on earth would Bush waste a nomination on a person who is a complete blank slate when we have a majority in the Senate!

We also have a majority in the House, state legislatures, state governorships, and have won five of the last seven presidential elections — seven of the last ten!

We’re the Harlem Globetrotters now – why do we have to play the Washington Generals every week?

She’s wrong in her comparison to Souter, of course; these comments make him look much more like the highly-ambitious Anthony Kennedy, but her opposition can only help him with the Senate, much like that of Moveon.org.

Fluffy is glad that everyone knows their job and is endeavoring to do it well.

HT Roger Simon

The nation’s left knee didn’t take long to start jerking. Here’s what the professional hysterics at Moveon. org want you to do:

In nominating John Roberts, the president has chosen a right wing corporate lawyer and ideologue for the nation’s highest court instead of a judge who would protect the rights of the American people. Working for mining companies, Roberts opposed clean air rules and worked to help coal companies strip-mine mountaintops. He worked with Ken Starr (yes, that Ken Starr), and tried to keep Congress from defending the Voting Rights Act. He wrote that Roe v. Wade should be “overruled,” and as a lawyer argued (and won) the case that stopped some doctors from even discussing abortion. That’s why we believe: “The Senate must not confirm right-wing corporate lawyer John Roberts to the Supreme Court.”

Clue: You can’t judge a man’s judicial philosophy by the arguments he made for his clients as an advocate. In the case of the Roe v. Wade comments, that client was the US government, representative of all of us, including the Berkeley hippies that run Moveon.

If Bush was to nominate somebody really bad, the arguments would be the same and nobody would pay any attention. Perhaps that’s why Bush put up Roberts, to flush these peckerwoods out.

John Dvorak speaks truth to power:

Will someone explain to me the benefits of a trendy system developed by Professor Lawrence Lessig of Stanford? Dubbed Creative Commons, this system is some sort of secondary copyright license that, as far as I can tell, does absolutely nothing but threaten the already tenuous “fair use” provisos of existing copyright law. This is one of the dumbest initiatives ever put forth by the tech community. I mean seriously dumb. Eye-rolling dumb on the same scale as believing the Emperor is wearing fabulous new clothes.

His assessment of CC is actually quite charitable.